The period following the birth of a child can be a trying one; not just for you, but also for your relationship. It might not be very obvious, but it takes a toll on your partner too. During this period it’s easy for the relationship you share with your significant other to be estranged. Juggling life, a thousand chores, dealing with fewer sleeping hours, and most importantly a new baby would leave you wondering: where did all the time go?!
But this doesn’t always have to be the case. Now that you have been given the heads-up, you don’t have to wait for the relationship to turn sour before you spice things up. And if the bond you share is already starting to weaken, here are some tips to tighten things up even better than before.
Show Them You Still Care
Before the baby came, remember how it was just you and your partner? It was easier, then, to show each other love because there was less stuff to do. This doesn’t have to stop, it may not be as elaborate as before, but there are simple and easy ways to show that you still care. You know your partner best and the little things that they like; inculcate this into your routine. Try to demonstrate acts of love towards your partner even if just once a week. Call them out of the blues ‘just to say “hey”’, buy them flowers at work just because; do they have a sweet tooth? Leave their favorite treats where they can see with a love note addressed to them. It is not about the enormousness of the act, but the thought behind it. Your partner would love it!
Go on a Lovers’ Stroll
You might wonder what time there is to take romantic strolls especially with the baby on the way. It’s easy! Whip out your baby’s stroller on a quiet, peaceful evening. Dress them appropriately for outside weather while you and your partner also dress comfortably for a walk. Choose a natural and calm setting, avoiding the hustle and bustle of traffic and bright lights that may disturb the baby. Take a stroll with your partner where you can have a nice chat as you go. Not only is the fresh air great for your child, but it also helps to induce sleep faster. It’s a win-win situation. You get to spend quality time with your partner while your baby enjoys a restful sleep or, a scenic view.
‘How Was Your day?’
This is a great way to spark a conversation with your significant other in the midst of the chaos of a rough day. Always try to find out how your partner’s day went. Those simple words go a long way to show that you actually care about how they spent their day and the struggles they might have faced. It is a great way to destress and can be easily reciprocated by them asking how your day went too. Don’t just assume that it was the ‘same old, same old’. Offer words of encouragement, share a laugh, or a pat on the back – whatever suits the occasion. You never know, this may be just what they needed to ease up the day’s tension.
Remember That You Both May Not ‘Parent’ the Same Way
Although you and your partner may share many beliefs that align, still, you are both different people with some differences. Your views on parenting may not always be the same. Expect these differences and remember that it is easier to accept them than to resist or fight them. You may speak with your partner about them and how you may come to a compromise. Do what works best for both of you. Learn to tolerate each other’s differences. This helps to build a stronger relationship with your spouse and also a healthy and conducive home for your baby to grow in.
Go to Therapy or Counseling
As much as we would love the post-birth parenting period to be as pleasant as possible, there are still a few times where simple acts of love and appreciation may just not be enough. Don’t hesitate or feel terrible about seeking help. Do it fast before things with your spouse deteriorate and go haywire. Talk with your spouse about seeing a counselor or therapist where you both would be able to consciously steer your relationship back on the rails. It may take some time, but it is the right thing to do. Counseling sessions also help direct you on how to juggle your new life as a parent more effectively.
It’s not so easy to get back on your feet after you’ve had a baby. However, romantic gestures, simple appreciations, acts of kindness, communication and a positive mind-set will surely speed up the process and get you far in strengthening the relationship between you and your spouse. Will you give it a shot?
Author’s Bio: Cheryl Hearts is a talented journalist from Boston, Massachusetts. From an early age, she was into writing so she decided to make it her career. Obtaining a Master’s Degree in Journalism has boosted her desire to grow as a journalist and currently she contributors to major media publications. Cheryl also runs her blog CherylHearts.com where she shares her opinion on topics trending in modern society.